Now that our date has been decided for us (as if it were an arranged marriage), Matt and I wanted to celebrate with our friends and family. We decided to do something a bit unconventional because marriage and relationships are NEVER perfect (if you think yours is, you're in denial). I believe that friends and family are the only people who can (and will) help you through the hard times. I realize, there will be plenty of arguments where I am going to want to cut Matt's head off, or he'll wish he had a Mute button so he didn't have to listen to me bitch about dropping the laundry NEXT to the laundry basket, not IN it. We wanted to have a party to celebrate our support system, our friendships and our families for helping us become the people we are.
I was trying to keep the details a secret, but Matt “didn’t hear me say that” … So the details and the "surprise" quickly spread. Matt and I planned to ask our friends and family invited to be a part of our bridal party.
Matt, who always claimed he would “never get married”, had decided on 10 groomsmen! I mean, come on. You didn't want to get married now, you have a list longer than a starting lineup?
I asked my parents if we could have the party at their house. I have been lucky enough to grow up in such a warm, welcoming, and loving home that I couldn't think of any other place to have it. I figured we could host a traditional New England lobster bake! Many of our guests had never been to Salem (let alone off of Long Island), so I thought the theme would be perfect!
My German/Polish carnivore of a fiancé wanted something a little different- a pig roast.
Because this wedding is about “US” I said okay. So there we were, hosting a lobster bake/ pig roast.
I ordered invitations and sent them to our hopeful bridal party. These invitations, by the way, were nothing but a pain. You would think its easy to find pig and lobster stickers right? Well, you can't! I went to every arts and crafts store in Westchester county trying to find those things. Because I wanted them to look a certain way, I was stuck drawing, cutting and gluing 50 little pigs and 50 lobsters onto the invitations.
It seems to be a tradition in the Lambert household, right before we host a party we fix things around the house. For example; the night before my college graduation party, my uncles laid down new hardwood floors in the living room. Nothing like some last minute fixes
This event put bridezilla, Tiger, in full force. He spent the next two months fixing the back yard. He and my brother, T.J., worked every weekend rebuilding, running wire and digging. When I would call to check-in, Tiger would tell me all about the hard work he had done, but never shared details, other than a new deck. I asked my sister and mother to send pictures of the updates. I wanted to see all of the work they had put into the yard. After a few days of them ignoring my requests, Sarah spilled the beans. They had strict instructions from Tiger NOT to send Matt or I any pictures of the yard. He wanted it to be a surprise. And a Surprise it was!
The weekend was finally here, Matt and I had planned to leave NY on Thursday so we could help my parents with last minute things. Anytime Matt and I leave our apartment for the weekend it's a production. Matt claims it takes him “two seconds” to pack a bag. What really happens: he asks if he should bring this, pack that, need more shorts, sweatshirts. He has “nothing that fits”, you get the idea.
I, on the other hand, try to make sure I have every option with me. Over the past few years I have really invested in my closet, and try and wear my “investments” as much as possible(the price to wear ratio; not so good). I had purchased a dress just for this occasion (like I didn't have anything in my closet). I thought it would cut down my options, and minimize my packing.
So after rushing around that morning, getting the gifts together, picking up last minute things, and packing, we were ready to go. Matt, like clock work, came home from work and rushed me out of the house. I like to circle around a few time to make sure I didnt forget anything. In his stern voice, he told me I had all day to do this. Why wasn't I ready? I figured I didn't want to start a pointless argument(picking my battles), grabbed my bag and got in the car.
It took us 5.5 hours to get home that night (thanks Rt. 128)!
Anyway, Friday morning Matt and I had an appointment with one of the hotels downtown Salem. We are still trying to find a hotel that can accommodate the number of rooms we need to reserve for our guests.
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| Mom's so crafty! Each flag stands for a letter …Lambert other side was Stambler! |
I was getting ready for our meeting when I started to look for my garment bag, which had all of my clothes in it. An adorable jumper (a new “investment”), the dress for my party, and a few “just incase” outfits. I yell for Matt and asked him where he hung it. He said he never saw it. I asked Sarah, who knew nothing about it either. I immediately go into panic mode. I ran to the car wearing nothing but Sarahs alabama bathrobe (why she has that we don't know, she never went there or even applied). I saw NOTHING! After I freaked out, we came to the realization that the garment bag was in our apartment in White Plains. I had never packed it because Matt rushed me out of the house! Was it really his fault? Probably not, but at that moment everything was his fault. If he didn't rush me out of the house I would have done my second walk through and saw the bag. My next thought was, ‘who’s coming to NY with me?’.
Matt remembered that his best friend John was picking up a friend who lived close enough to our apartment that he could grab it. John has been Matt’s best friend since elementary school and honestly, I was unsure if he even liked me. I’ve been around for years and years, but I never seemed to get a good or bad vibe from him until recently. I get it, they haven't been on their “MANcations” to romantic destinations as frequently, or see each other as much as they would like, due to us splitting what little time we had off between Long Island and Massachusetts. Like me or not, he was going to get my clothes!
I calmed down for a few seconds, then, realized he didn't have keys! Thankfully Matt was already on the phone with the super. He definitely didn't want to deal with me if he didn't get my clothes. After what seemed like hours, the super called with good news, he found the copy of our key.
While Sarah and I were concocting bourbon lemonade and sangria for tomorrows party, about 10 of our friends and family had to make sure it wasn't poisonous. Lets just say, there wasn't much lemonde left for the party. We all woke up with a bit of a headache the next morning. But there was no time for a hangover, we had a party to get ready for!
Donna had done an amazing job preparing for this event! She had all of the food ready to go, she knew what time the guys needed to put the 9 racks of ribs on, when she wanted her wings put out, and of course when the 20+ pound pig shoulder needed to be on the grill.
The 60+ lobsters were the star of the show. We were able to get the lobsters fresh as fresh can get. They were caught and cooked within 3 hours of leaving the ocean (perks of living on the North Shore)
As soon as all of our guest were finished eating, Sarah helped me bring out the gifts.
Matt, got the guys monogrammed beer glasses. I, on the other hand, went a bit over board. Since our engagement, I have become absolutely addicted to Etsy. I found myself ordering gifts every other day because hey, it only happens once. So I found about 70 different ways to ask the girls to be my bridesmaid.
I prepared myself all day to explain why we wanted to have the party the way we did (by prepare, I mean that I did not get inebriated by 4pm). As soon as Matt and I stood up in front of our friend and family, I lost it. I became overwhelmed with emotions. How could I be so lucky to have everything I have? I was standing next to the love of my life, looking out at our friends and family asking them to be part of our wedding. I couldn't get a word out.
Thankfully, Matt is like the Tinman. With a few emotionless words, he officially asked our friends and family to be a part of our wedding party. I calmed myself down had a drink and mingled with my offical bridal party!
- Ash
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