What
is a modern bride? What is so different between our parents/grandparents
weddings and weddings today? Is it that we spend more money? The personal
details? Trendy attire? Pintrest?
While
reading through wedding magazines and bridal blogs, all I see is "Today's
modern bride", "New wedding rules", “New cakes, fashion, decor
and gift ideas.” It really got me thinking…
Editorials
ads, magazines, and wedding planning websites make it easier to collect
ideas, search vendors, and create an inspiration board. But when it comes
down to the actual wedding, what makes it new?
A
wedding is defined as a marriage ceremony; a ceremony in which two people get
married.
When
you break it down, after a year plus of planning, decor, makeup, dresses,
flowers and spending money, you're "new" wedding is nothing but a
wonderful, amazing memory… While pondering how creative and different I would
like our wedding to be, I realized, it didn’t matter.
What
you really remember, are the people you shared it with. We all have them, the
dreaded distant family members, cousins you haven’t seen in years or the people
you have never met. Every bride will be faced with this issue. I have a very
blunt, but true belief about it (sorry if I offend anyone).
Matt
and I are very “real” people. We do not hide behind the “perfect” relationship
curtain, or brag to people about how in love we are. We are getting
married for us, to celebrate our love, and our forever future together. Yeah
Matt that’s right, FOR-EV-ER (Sandlot voice). We want to share
that day with people who know us, who know what we have been through, and will
continue to show support.
As we
were making our mile long guest list, I realized our “maybe” list had many
people on it who have impacted my life more than others on the “invite” list.
The
majority of people on this list are the lovely, beautiful, pants-peeing M.O.M’s
Group (Donna’s friends. Here’s your shout out ladies). Many of these
women I have known since I was 6 or 7 years old. They watched me grow up, play
soccer, get into trouble, graduate college, move to NY and actually be able to
pay all of my bills, alone. They support my mom, and my mom supports
them. This rare crowd (rare, being kind) has been a part of my life more than others I HAVE to invite. Their continuous encouragement, drinking ways are
nothing short of LOVE. I’m forced to invite others who have no idea about
my life, my relationship, and who I am instead of these women?
A
wedding is a celebration of a couple's commitment to one another. It’s a time
for your friends and family to party, bless you're new “life”, share their
happiness and support. If you're inviting people who do not know you, why are
they there? If you're second guessing if you are one of those people, then….
I get
it, and to avoid offending anyone, my entire family will be invited. I
just wanted to share the truth, the real, and the honest. Again, this blog is
not about all of the happy times, the venue band or all of the crazy things
Tiger does. It’s about WHAT REALLY HAPPENS BEFORE I DO, situations I am faced
with during this amazing time in my life.
So,
back to what makes a modern bride. I really got to thinking, what would make my
wedding “new”? I have the venue, a band and that’s about it. God, that’s
scary. What if I don’t want to be new? What if I want my wedding to be
traditional? What can I do to make our guest leave saying, "WOW,
that was an amazing time!”?
I
Googled “what makes a wedding modern”. An interesting article from brides.com
popped up, "75 ways to make your wedding unique" the article was
75 different decorating ideas. These ideas could pertain to any event or party,
not just a wedding.
In
the fashion world, trends seem to cycle every 20 years. As we saw the duchess,
Kate, wore a long sleeve gown. Many people thought how amazing, different, and
new. But in all reality Sarah Burton (The creative director for Alexander
McQueen) recycled an 80's style. The long sleeves were not "new". I'm
sure you all remember the mid 80's wedding dresses. Donna being one of those
lucky brides had selves, pickups, satin, and according pleating. God, there was
a lot going on. This gown actually had some qualities that I liked. The
sleeves, not so much.
I
don't know how to answer my own question or if I even believe there is such
thing as a “new” wedding. What’s new is old, right? All I can tell you is that
our wedding will be a reflection of us, what we believe, and what we want to
share with those invited.
Brides to be, or now “MRS.” What do you think makes a wedding
"new"?
- Ash
